Identity badge

I lost some material from last year because my laptop's hard disk died spontaneously in October. Luckily, I mail some things to myself sometimes ;).

So, here is an email that came whilst I was off in mourning so I am guessing the form in question is for security clearance. The last sentence says it all really and 100% genuine. I don't make this shit up you know.


From: PM Lead
Subject: Security forms

Please note that the last page, page 12, of the form has to be completed. You need to present a form of ID to your manager (passport preferred), in case they don't recognise you, and they sign the form.


My response at the time to my team mate was:

1) what type of ID does one have that has a photo on?

(a) a student NUS card
(b) a bus pass
(c) a taxi driver badge
(d) a passport

2) if your manager doesn't recognise your face, what is wrong. The manager...

(a) is a twat
(b) is too busy going to meetings to meet staff
(c) is working from home as usual
(d) is on a 2 week holiday and no-one else standing in knows you from Adam


3) your team lead is off, so you don't "have" a manager to sign the form, never mind look at your ID then your face, then your ID again. Do you:

(a) laugh hysterically
(b) point at PM
(c) laugh again
(d) sign the form yourself with your left-hand and then hand it in


If you answered a-d on all questions go to the top of the class and work the weekend, as approved by me and Flakey even though he's in Italy or somewhere.
If not, get your coat you're leaving.

Mike