Job descriptions on steroids
After perusing the network for a document I needed I came across a job description. Here's what it says, copyright Toxic Ltd. of course so don't try to copy and paste this or they will sue your ass.
Enabling back-end Infrastructure
Enabling Back-End Infrastructure scope of deliverables are primarily aligned with the Microsoft Wintel server architectures. This is for the infrastructure layer and not for definition of the application layer but does include the integration of that application layer.
Within the remit of the team, we integrate with the Portfolio and Core engineering offerings to align with the Client Engineering requirements of any of our given customers.
The team operates at the EMEA level and defines the design and engineering activities to provide:
- Server Platform specification and configuration
- Server Operating System build for Microsoft Infrastructure
- File and Print solutions, typically, integration of LAD
- Name Resolution (DNS/WINS) and IP management (DHCP)
- Application platforms – Resilience and high availability
- Server components, and not limited to, Login scripts, server policy, migration
- Printing solutions
- Virtualisation
- Thin Client backend solutions
The solutions are designed to integrate end to end from the distributed office server space back to the infrastructure components delivered into the datacentre to ensure Toxic delivers a complete solution set that supports the needs of the customer in the desktop infrastructure.
End User Devices
The aim of End User Devices is to bring together, as a single team within EMEA, all personnel with relevant expertise with end user devices e.g. desktop and laptop hardware and operating system builds (Windows 2000/XP), locally attached peripherals such as printers and scanners, and so on. The combined skills of this team will be used to provide design capability, build capability, and provide ongoing support for solutions developed to support the desktop client build throughout the EMEA region.
Translation podule 3.141596 loading....bullshitese to English
Analysing information stream....
Enabling back-end Infrastructure (bullshit factor 90%....Back office)
They work on Microsoft shit because it's all point and click and they only know how to use a mouse. They work on this layer, not that one, but they can touch that one because they are so clever. They integrate engineering things to what the customers want so are really special. They do lots and lots of thing, like:
- Choosing what shiny big servers to play with
- Putting the Microsoft CD in and using the wizzy wizard
- Sharing files
- Managing DNS, WINS and IP.....oh the computer does all that....err
- Resilience and high availability by rebooting the big servers when they bluescreen
- Server components, and not limited to, Login scripts, server policy, migration
- Printing solutions - right-click, share printer
- Virtualisation - almost servers...shh...don't tell anyone
- Thin Client backend solutions (what do you mean the Citrix team do that??)
The stuff plugs in and joins the customer's servers to a big rooms with lots and lots of servers in called a "datacentre". The is so the customer can use their desktop computers to send email and get their files.
End User Devices (bullshit rating 99.9% - translation, front office)
Are a bunch of techies who build desktop and laptops. They install printers and scanners sometimes and give some customer support. They are not important anyway.
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